XXXI – Roman Holiday And Shocked Mutt

Dear Journal:

Mutts!

I love all three of those wrinkly clowns dearly, but, sometimes they do something that makes me want to pull my hair out. That was the case on one particular bright summer’s day. The Lady, some advisors (they stuck to me like glue . . . or parasites), and two of the Mutts (Mutt Three had left with the Tribune; no doubt to look at all the pretty, sparkly things in the sub basement) were with me, enjoying the morning breeze and just relaxing, for a change.

Small talk about nothing in particular was bantered back and forth. We had been spending most of our waking hours on the reorganization plan, trying to figure out which countries to cut loose. Not an easy task to be sure. Everyone had personal or economic interests somewhere. Thus the day off.

I had ordered a day of no politics, no Imperial business, no squabbling over anything. Just recuperation.

It was during this lazy, summer morning that Mutt Three pulled her stupid. The Tribune came tearing onto the patio, breathless and yammering nonsensibly about what we couldn’t figure out. Then entered Mutt Three.

She was ambling in a stagger pattern that, more or less, got her where she was going.
Her fur was slightly singed and ruffled, and her eyes were a little glazed. To the frantic enquiries of the other mutts, all she could say was ‘urf . urf . . .’. She even appeared to be mumbling her little doggie tune backwards, as far as I could tell.

I looked at the Tribune, who looked as if he was about to have kittens, and quietly, but forcefully, demanded to know why my dog looked slightly roasted. Between gulps of wine, handed to him by the Lady, the Tribune commenced his explanation.

It seems that Mutt Three had decided to help with the audit of the loot downstairs. While the Tribune supervised the auditors, Three went around sniffing and poking at various and sundry objects. That was, until she poked at the nasty, gold box.

The second her nose touched the side of that thing, the box glowed and a fat, blue flash jumped from the box to Three. The mutt was thrown halfway across the room, ending up against a far wall, upside down. Aside from the effects previously mentioned, she seemed to be alright.

With one other exception. Her eyes tended to glow intermittently.

I summoned the palace vet, who looked over Three very carefully, and pronounced that she only seemed to be in shock, which she should recover from with no ill effects. He then told us some other surprising news.

Remember her little doggie tune? Well, the vet announced that Three was preggers, and about to give birth fairly soon. Pregnant!? When did that happen, and with whom? I looked over at the other Mutts, and One was grinning from ear to ear. Well, that answered my question. It looked like there would be more wrinkly mouths to feed. And that, fairly soon. Some day off!

Chapter XXXII

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