XXX – Rome Needs To Lose Weight!

Dear Journal:

After the mess with the treasury and the finding of all that loot, I thought I’d take it a little easy and tend to other, simpler duties. Made for an easier day, right?

Uh uh! Nope. No chance.

The Mutts, advisors, the Lady, and myself trooped off to the map room to get an eagle’s eye view of the Empire. I needed perspective. It was there, while pouring over maps and statistics, that I discovered what should have been an obvious fact.

The Roman Empire was WAY too big!

I know that’s an odd thing for the Emperor of Rome to say, but there it was! As a private citizen, I only vaguely knew how much Rome ruled. As the Emperor, I saw for myself the extent of our dominions.

Map after map showed a conglomeration of former nations, city states, and empires lumped together under the rulership of Rome. The Caesars before me had added to their personal prestige by conquering more and more territoy. All done to glorify themselves. No wonder we were in trouble. At this point in history, we simply didn’t have the manpower to govern such a huge chunk of the world.

Most of our armies had been bulked up by native conscripts and foreign mercenaries. The actual ‘Roman Legions’ were scattered across the Empire, except for the mob sitting outside of Rome itself. When I was a merchant, the first rule of business was “remain profitable”.

One could always sell off parts of the company that were money drainers. Then it hit me. Why couldn’t the same be done with the Empire!? Pull the Legions out of those regions that were draining our strength, and return local rule to the natives. Let them take care of themselves, for once.

My answer was quick in coming. Dismantle the Empire!!?? NEVER!! SACRILEGE!! TREASON!!

My answer was just as pointed. “SHUT UP ALREADY! Let me finish! We don’t break up the WHOLE empire. We just cut off the parts that are draining us financially and militarily.”

I looked over at the Lady, who had been silent during the ‘discussion’. She stared at me intently with a little half smile curling her lips. I knew that look. It said “go get ’em!” She approved!

It was at that moment that the debate was interrupted by a messenger. Reading the message, I realized I had the weapon to win this debate. The news I shared with the rest of the room was short and to the point. The Parthian Empire had collapsed. After our invasion, the Parthians had been left too weak to hold on to their numerous territories.

Result? Total collapse!

I looked around the room with a grim stare. Did we want to be next? The answer was without dissent. Somebody had to go on the chopping block. So it was that the resizing of the Roman Empire began!

Chapter XXXI

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